Today was my “official” first day as a stay at home mama. And let me tell you…
It was perfect.
If things were still the same and I were still in the classroom, today would have been the first day of school. I would’ve met my new students, spent the day “laying down the law” and setting the tone for the year, only to come home exhausted and already thinking about tomorrow. Working full time really drained me, especially last year. I’d come home to two babies and would go through the same routine night after night. We’d play for an hour, eat dinner, do baths and then it was bedtime. Yet, I still couldn’t shut my teacher-brain off and was always stressing about my job. I just felt like I was never giving them 100% of me at any given time and it took a toll on me. And because of that, I felt like I had little patience with my children. I was so exhausted and stressed that it truly was difficult for me to stop, slow down and understand them.
But today was different.
Our day started off with check-ups at the doctor that included those dreaded shots for both ladies. It’s almost as if Abby knew what was coming. Haha. She hid behind my legs while we were in the room. Anna though, she has no idea what was coming! She was laughing and babbling so much that it broke my heart to know that her joyful demeanor was about to be rudely interrupted. They both took it like champs though! And they both cried when the other was getting shots. They just love each other.
Abby with her “brave girl” lollipop!
Both girls fell asleep on the way home and stayed asleep when we got there. I started preparing for a lethargic day…again, those darn shots are a doozy. The low fevers started setting in and I guessed right – today was going to be a sing-a-long day. Neither girl was interested in playing. At any given point during the day, I was rocking one or both girls.
I’ll never turn down snuggle time.
By 7:00, both girls were asleep. They were so relaxed from both the side effects of their shots and Tylenol.
So how was today different?
For the first time, I felt 100% there for them. I was completely invested in them with nothing else on my mind. When they got fussy, my first reaction wasn’t annoyance. It was understanding. When Abby got pushy with me at one point, I was able to prevent a tantrum.
And here’s the best part:
My girls needed their mommy for snuggles and love today and I was there to give it. It’s such a big deal to me. I know that I am nowhere near being a perfect mom, but for me, making this transition has made me a better one.
I’m so thankful that the Lord has called me back into my home for this season. He doesn’t forget or ignore the desires of our heart, especially when those desires are aligned with His.
“Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4
How has the Lord fulfilled the desires of your heart?